2015 Year in Review

This was a weird year for me and my 2015 did its best to defy summation. That said, let's just jump right in.

The little that never runs out

I'm a bit behind in writing this, but the Old Testament reading in the lectionary last week was the story of Elijah and The Widow of Zarephath in 1 Kings 17: 8-16 [ESV]:

Then the word of the Lord came to him, “Arise, go to Zarephath, which belongs to Sidon, and dwell there. Behold, I have commanded a widow there to feed you.” So he arose and went to Zarephath. And when he came to the gate of the city, behold, a widow was there gathering sticks. And he called to her and said, “Bring me a little water in a vessel, that I may drink.” And as she was going to bring it, he called to her and said, “Bring me a morsel of bread in your hand.” And she said, “As the Lord your God lives, I have nothing baked, only a handful of flour in a jar and a little oil in a jug. And now I am gathering a couple of sticks that I may go in and prepare it for myself and my son, that we may eat it and die.” And Elijah said to her, “Do not fear; go and do as you have said. But first make me a little cake of it and bring it to me, and afterward make something for yourself and your son. For thus says the Lord, the God of Israel, ‘The jar of flour shall not be spent, and the jug of oil shall not be empty, until the day that the Lord sends rain upon the earth.’” And she went and did as Elijah said. And she and he and her household ate for many days. The jar of flour was not spent, neither did the jug of oil become empty, according to the word of the Lord that he spoke by Elijah.

God told Elijah that he had commanded a widow there to feed him, but the widow didn't seem to know this when Elijah asked for food. She only had a little flour and a little oil, and was prepared to make one last meal of bread, eat it, and die! It appears like she had so little she had despaired of earthly provision. But God was there nonetheless.

She heard the promises of Elijah about what the Lord would do for her, and the little she had became the little that did not run out.

The world tends to measure provision in money, food, or possessions, or even good health, happiness, or lack of suffering. But plenty of God's children find themselves without some or all of these things. Yet, God surely provides for His children, even if the world is blind in seeing His provision.

God provides and sustains faith--sometimes maybe only the size of a mustard seed. But even just a little faith provided and sustained by God becomes the little that never runs out, even when all of the things the world looks to are gone. Even in death.

The closing stanza of the hymn "Jesus Lives! The Victory's Won" comes to mind:

Jesus lives! And now is death

       But the gate of life immortal;

This shall calm my trembling breath

       When I pass its gloomy portal.

Faith shall cry, as fails each sense:

Jesus is my confidence!

--Lutheran Service Book #490

I wonder if the widow was planning to eat and die out of despair, or if she planned to meet death in the knowledge faith brings that death couldn't hurt her. Maybe she was secure in accepting what God provided to sustain her, even when this means all earthly things have been taken away and meeting death in faith.

God's provision surely does sometimes include earthly wealth, health, happiness, and comfort. I'm thankful that I have been blessed with always having ample provision of my earthly needs. It is not hard to accept these gifts of provision from God. But we can learn with the widow to accept the provision God gives even when it means using up the very last of our earthly store and being unafraid of death. For with the confidence of faith provided and sustained by God, we can walk through death as the gate of life immortal.

Yes, we surely can be content in all circumstances and rejoice in the Lord always. For God provides us with and sustains us in faith, which, no matter how small a gift the world sees this faith as, is the little that never runs out.

On the Cross Our Sins Christ Carried (Baptism Hymn)

I've shared on this blog before a few of my original hymn texts, but there are many I've written that I haven't shared. The 4th hymn text I wrote was for a hymn for use at Baptisms, and I think the time has come to finally put it up here. You can find the text below, but let me explain why today is the perfect day to share it.

How the NEA's Resolution on Homeschooling gets nearly everything wrong.

Yesterday, I saw a discussion on Twitter that the National Education Association (NEA) had attacked homeschooling in their 2014-2015 Resolutions. I decided to investigate and look at the actual resolution on homeschooling myself and was very upset with what I read. This will be a very long post that will deal exclusively on the one NEA resolution on Homeschooling. If you would like to see the other resolutions, you may view them by following the link above.

God Calls to Us, Says “Here am I.”

God calls to us, says “Here am I.”
       Reveals Himself to us by grace.
“Keep to yourself! Do not draw nigh.”
       Our answer provokes to God's face.
“I am too holy” we go on,
       “Too holy for you.” to God say.
Our own devices drive us on
       To reject God, send Him away.

What holiness is this we name?
       Our hearts pour out their lust and pride.
What virtue do we say we claim?
       Our tongues lash out to curse and lie.
What love gives proof of sanctity?
       Our love of self and perverse wants.
What peace shows forth our unity?
       Our peace that rings out jeers and taunts.

If God had left us in our sin
       Imprisoned in our unbelief,
On judgment day how great a din
       Of wailing we would sound in grief.
God's fury He would on us spend
       To pay us our deservèd wage.  
The truth we then would apprehend      
       In endless torment ne'er assuaged.

But God in flesh Himself revealed
       To call unto Himself His own.
And though rejected, light revealed
       By which our darkness is well shown.
Yet in our disobedience crass,
       To which God binds all men by Law,
God shows His mercy on the cross
       From whence forgiveness flows to all.

What here revealed is wondrous grace:
       That though God's wrath we well deserve,
Christ bore this wrath--died in our place--
       So unto life God us reserves.
His sob'ring Word God speaks to us
       Lest we forget our source of life,
And spurn the grace God gives to us
       That saves us from our sin and strife. 

[Fall 2012]

Our Fallen World Is Steeped in Sin (Or, An Inadvertent Hymn Limerick)

Our fallen world is steeped in sin
Surrounding us, without, within.
       Our own strength fails,
       Will not avail
To 'gainst the curse the battle win.

Yet some think that they can attain
To holiness which life them gains.
       With hard'ning hearts,
       They set apart
Themselves as free from sinful stain.

Upon the Law do they rely
And place their hope to curse deny.
       Yet shows their deaths
       The curse's breadth
For from the Law their works belie.

Where our own strength is worthless shown
God makes His pow'r in weakness known:
       Christ, crucified,
       In weakness died,
His blood shed to our sin atone.

Though free from sin and curse's blame
Christ spurned not cross and curse became.
       In dying thus,
       Christ redeemed us,
And by this sin's curse overcame.

Set free from self-reliant ways,
We now on Christ do fix our gaze.
       We need not fear,
       For faith sees here,
The strength for everlasting days.

[2013]

Faith rest

[I wrote this based on the submission theme "Faith" for a magazine, but I ultimately decided not to submit it. I remembered it a few days ago and thought I might as well post it here]

~~~~~~~

I believe

                 in God, the Father Almighty, maker of heaven and earth.

And in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord. . .

Five months ago, I sat under this same tree at the edge of the cemetery.

“Daddy! Daddy! I can’t get down!” the girl screamed.

Her bright red jacket matched the leaves falling from the trees,

but this leaf didn’t want to fall and was hanging on with all her life.

“DADDY!”

“How did you get there?” her father asked mirthfully, running to his crying daughter.

“Jump and I’ll catch you.”

The screaming wind carried her laughter to me as she smiled

and threw herself backwards off the playground.

Leaves swirled as he spun with her laughing in his arms.

. . .was crucified, died and was buried. . .

Now I stand under the leafless tree.

The playground is empty as I watch them

lower her casket into the snow-covered ground.

. . .The third day He rose again from the dead. . .

As I turn to leave, the wind blows the snow

and I see a white crocus against the revealed ground.

. . .the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen.

[March 14, 2014]

On walking into church in the middle of your own hymn

A few months ago, my hymn In Love Christ Shed His Tears was published in the Winter 2014 issue of Lutheran Forum. Now it is Lent, and the music director at the church I am a member at, Holy Cross (LCMS), decided to make the hymn the theme hymn for Lent. It was used on Ash Wednesday and again this morning, so I'm interested in seeing just how many services it is going to show up in throughout Lent as the theme hymn. This is very exciting for me, but there has been a humorous aspect to it as well.

Triptych

I.

I say I want to know;

my idol, pride, beckons;

but knowing means death.

When deeds are my greatest wisdom,

I am an actor seeking reality

I say I want to know.

I hunt after myself

to know where to direct my aim,

but knowing means death.

Ambition consumes the fruit

of my potential

I say I want to know.

I realize my potential

and know the harvest banquet of myself,

but knowing means death.

I feast on my realized self,

and taste the achievement

I say I want to know.

I strip my drying bones clean

to nourish the renown I know,

but knowing means death.

Broken bones show experience

of wounds from brave deeds

I say I want to know.

What lasts of these brave deeds?

A crippled skeleton knows,

and knowing means death.

I want to know myself,

and experience my merit.

I say I want to know,

but knowing means death.

II.

Now I have eyes to see

that the mirror shows my dry bones,

as I meet the one who kills and makes alive.

He holds the mirror and shoves

eyeballs into my vacant skull so

now I have eyes to see.

His commands tell me to stand, and how,

but I lack muscles to raise myself

as I meet the one who kills and makes alive.

I cannot stand to honor my Judge, yet

I see Him bow to judgment

now I have eyes to see.

The Judge strikes my crimes from the record

while He is stricken to death

as I meet the one who kills and makes alive.

He was raised up in death,

and I see Him raised up to life

now I have eyes to see.

His now scarred hands do what I cannot

and raise me up to His side

as I meet the one who kills and makes alive.

From His side flow blood and water

as I see Him give me His own body

now I have eyes to see.

Given life in the water,

I am saved to have breath

as I meet the one who kills and makes alive.

He gives me ears to hear

the Word that creates life.

Now I have ears to hear

the One who kills and makes alive.

III.

He loves to tell me,

and, rather than be heard,

now I want to listen.

He has claimed me as His treasured possession

by giving me to bear His name

He loves to tell me

“To be owned an object of affection is better,”

says the widow to me

now I want to listen.

He has adopted me as His child

and bathes and dresses me in forgiveness

He loves to tell me.

“Being a dependent is better,”

says the orphan to me

now I want to listen.

He is proud to identify the resemblance:

“You surely look like my Son,”

He loves to tell me.

The shamed fear being accused and hide,

but identify themselves when they recognize

now I want to listen.

He wants to listen to me,

and give me the answer of “Yes”

He loves to tell me.

The muted humble ask again

for aid I past deafly rejected, yet

now I want to listen.

“I free you from your solitary coffinment

and give you Myself and others to love and serve.”

He tells me in love,

and now I want to listen.

[2013]